This is a list of plagiarists from worst to best, based on a complex formula weighing the magnitude of their crimes against their observed contributions to human culture. Pastiche does not count unless it's significant and enduring. These rankings are entirely objective and indisputably true.

60. Shia LeBeouf

59. Osama bin Laden

58. George Zimmerman

57. Commencement speakers

56. Ann Coulter

55. Benny Johnson

54. Alan Dershowitz

53. Rod Stewart

52. Robin Thicke

51. Ben Domenech

50. Lianne Spiderbaby

49. Ward Churchill

48. Maureen Dowd

47. Jay Leno

46. Gerald Posner

45. Dave Zinczenko

44. Chuck Norris

43. Madonna

42. Slavoj Zizek

41. Jonah Lehrer

40. Monica Crowley

39. The Beach Boys

38. Fareed Zakaria

37. The Daily Beast

36. James Franco

35. This Chinese TV sitcom

34. Johann Hari

33. Ruth Shalit

32. Jayson Blair

31. Chris Hedges

30. Kaavya Viswanathan

29. Jacob Epstein

28. Joseph Smith

27. The Rolling Stones

26. Doris Kearns Goodwin

25. Chris Anderson

24. Stephen Ambrose

23. "Epic college welcome speech" guy

22. Marc Jacobs

21. Jack London

20. H.G. Wells

19. Jane Goodall

18. Joe Biden

17. Rand Paul

16. Barack H. Obama

15. Other politicians

14. Led Zeppelin

13. Nina Totenberg

12. Radiohead

11. Oscar Wilde

10. Ian McEwan

9. Alex Haley

8. Samuel Taylor Coleridge

7. Vanilla Ice

6. Tie: Andy Warhol/Marcel Duchamp

5. George Harrison

4. Q.R. Markham

3. Laurence Sterne

2. Michael Bolton

1. Jonathan Lethem

[Photo credit: Larry Busacca/Getty Images]